More Than the Ask: What Elected Officials and Major Donors Have in Common (and what it can teach us about nonprofit advocacy)

When I first began working in and around the Vermont State House, I expected to learn about policy. I expected to learn about legislation, regulations, fiscal notes, committee structures, and parliamentary procedure. I definitely learned those things.

But the most important lesson had nothing to do with policy. It had everything to do with relationships.

Over the past year, I’ve had the opportunity to spend time with legislators, committee chairs, agency leaders, advocates, business leaders, healthcare providers, and community members from every corner of Vermont. What surprised me most was how familiar the work felt.

After spending much of my career in fundraising and nonprofit leadership, I realized something I hadn’t expected: Effective advocacy is remarkably similar to major donor stewardship.

Both are built on trust. Both require patience. Both depend on listening.

Both succeed when relationships become more important than transactions.

Too often, nonprofits approach elected officials the same way organizations approach fundraising when they’re under pressure. They show up only when they need something.

A grant. A budget appropriation. A policy change. A vote. An introduction.

The relationship begins with the ask. That is where the relationship begins to break down.

The relationship should never begin with the ask.

That lesson became incredibly clear during one of my first weeks working in the Legislature. I watched legislators from opposite sides of an issue greet each other warmly, ask about each other’s families, laugh about something that happened over the weekend, and then walk into a committee room where they would spend the next two hours debating complex policy.

It reminded me that disagreement and distrust are not the same thing.

The strongest relationships can withstand difficult conversations because they were built before those conversations became necessary.

I’ve seen the same thing happen in committee hearings. The testimony that creates the greatest impact isn’t always the most polished or the most data-driven. Often, it’s delivered by someone legislators already know, someone who has consistently shown up, shared information honestly, admitted when they didn’t have every answer, and invested in the relationship over time.

The testimony matters. But the trust was built long before the hearing ever began.

Trust is built long before legislation is introduced.

The strongest advocates I’ve encountered operate differently. They invest in relationships long before they need them. They attend community events. They visit local organizations. They ask questions. They learn what matters in a legislator’s district.

They understand that elected officials are not simply policymakers. They are neighbors, parents, volunteers, business owners, coaches, and community leaders trying to solve complicated problems with incomplete information.

In many ways, they are stakeholders in the very same ecosystem nonprofits serve every day.

The comparison to fundraising became impossible for me to ignore. The best major gift officers don’t begin with a proposal. They begin with curiosity.

They don’t ask, “How much can this person give?”

They ask: What motivates them? What do they care about? What kind of impact do they hope to have? How can we create value together?

Great advocates ask remarkably similar questions.

What challenges are you hearing from constituents? What concerns are employers raising? What opportunities exist in your community? What information would actually be helpful to your decision-making?

Notice that none of those questions begin with an ask. They begin with understanding. That is stewardship.

Another lesson from fundraising translates almost perfectly to advocacy: consistency matters more than visibility. Major donors don’t want to hear from an organization only when it’s campaign season. Neither do elected officials.

The strongest nonprofit leaders stay connected throughout the year. They share community successes. They invite legislators to visit programs. They celebrate wins together. They provide useful information without expecting an immediate return.

That’s exactly what good stewardship looks like. It’s also what good advocacy looks like. Those conversations create something every nonprofit desperately needs but cannot buy: Trust.

Trust changes everything. Trust creates access. Trust creates dialogue. Trust creates opportunities to solve problems together. Most importantly, trust creates the conditions for meaningful impact.

That impact extends far beyond a single bill or policy outcome.

When nonprofits build authentic relationships with elected officials, they become stronger connectors within their communities. They help bridge gaps between government and residents. They surface emerging needs earlier. They identify opportunities for collaboration. They help create solutions that no single organization could achieve alone.

In other words, advocacy becomes community building. And community building is one of the highest forms of leadership.

This is particularly important at a moment when many communities are experiencing declining trust in institutions. Nonprofits are uniquely positioned to help rebuild that trust. Not because they have all the answers, but because they are often closest to the people experiencing the challenges.

They hear the stories. They see the needs. They understand the opportunities.

When those insights are paired with strong relationships across local, regional, state, and federal government, remarkable things become possible.

Policies improve. Resources flow more effectively. Partnerships emerge. Communities become stronger.

The lesson I continue to learn from my time in the Vermont Legislature is that advocacy is not fundamentally about politics. It is about people.

It is about showing up. It is about listening. It is about investing in relationships before you need something. Because lasting change rarely happens through a single transaction.

Whether you’re cultivating a major donor or engaging an elected official, the greatest impact often comes from the same place: A trusted relationship built over time.

In fundraising, we call that stewardship. In advocacy, we often call it engagement.

I think they’re really the same practice expressed in different settings.

One Place to Start

If your organization wants to strengthen its advocacy, don’t begin by asking what legislation you should support. Instead, ask yourself:

• Which elected officials know our organization before they need to vote on an issue affecting us?
• How often do we reach out when we aren’t asking for anything?
• Have we invited policymakers to see our work firsthand?
• Are we investing in relationships with the same intentionality we invest in donor stewardship?

Because the strongest advocacy strategy isn’t built when a bill is introduced.

It’s built every day before anyone needs to ask for a vote.

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