Emotions in Nonprofit Work: Time for a Deeper Understanding
I often wonder: if the emotions of a nonprofit professional were played out on the big screen in Pixar’s Inside Out, what would it look like? What core memories and deep beliefs drive our behavior and motivation?
As a change expert, I constantly think about the factors that propel or stifle the change we desire to see in the world. There are many layers to the work we do—program development, strategic visioning, fundraising, organizational development, technology adoption, etc.—but beneath it all are the human emotions that each employee, board member, and volunteer brings to the work.
Every action (or inaction) is tied to an emotion connected with core memories, deep beliefs, and ultimately, the identities we hold.
Demystifying Emotions
I like the simple definition of emotion used by the authors of 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership: Emotion = E (energy) + in motion (within our body). Emotion is a physical sensation we feel, much like hunger or thirst. We can notice, experience, and address emotions without becoming consumed by them. Consciously noting the physical sensation of an emotion eases its reactive power.
You could also think of emotions like sound waves that move through your senses. Pumping music at a game with excited fans feels one way, while calming spa music soothes and calms our nervous system in another.
Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, in How Emotions are Made, explores the neuroscience behind why and how we feel emotions. Our mind and entire nervous system are prediction machines. For instance, when hiking, you might jump back at the sight of something snake-like on the trail before you even fully process it’s just a rope. We have emotional reactions before rational thought kicks in.
Our brains are constantly taking in information and comparing it to past experiences. For example, when you get an email that says, “I need to talk to you,” your mind may immediately pull from past negative experiences of similar conversations. If you’ve faced disappointment from past work situations, programs, or fundraising efforts, your mind will naturally anticipate similar outcomes in the present. These connections, though often subconscious, influence our behavior.
Understanding these mechanisms helps bring awareness to how past experiences drive our current emotions.
Emotions Driving Change
Despite the predictive nature of our brains, they are also brilliant at imagining different futures. Most of us operate from the belief that things can and should be different—this is part of our superpower as social impact professionals. The emotions of nonprofit professionals drive an enormous amount of good in the world. Writing a grant or giving a presentation with the energy of conviction compels others to join the cause. Being mindful of the emotional state you bring to meetings, fundraising, and strategy sessions shapes the outcomes you create.
From the outside, people might assume that working for a meaningful cause keeps us in a perpetual good mood. Perhaps we even believed this ourselves when we entered the nonprofit sector. But the reality is, we are human. The full spectrum of emotions—positive and negative—creates a richness and wisdom we can draw from.
The emotion wheel is a great tool to improve our ability to name and notice the variety of emotions we experience in our work and organizations.
The goal is not to only feel positive emotions and ignore the ones we dislike. The goal is to bring AWARENESS to the full range of emotions and how they impact how we show up as leaders in our work and life.
Emotions at Play
The saying “What we resist persists” applies to emotions. When we allow ourselves to feel a negative emotion without reacting or resisting, the energy can pass through us. By allowing yourself to feel sad without clinging to it, you can move on to emotions like resilience, commitment, or hopefulness. Unfortunately, many of us don’t take the time to recognize or process underlying emotions, which can lead to undesired outcomes for ourselves and our organizations.
Here are a few example:
– We avoid honest conversations because we don’t want to upset others, and as good people, we feel we shouldn’t.
– We hesitate to apply for grants or make bold requests because we fear disappointment if they’re denied.
– We delay implementing new technology because we don’t want to feel embarrassed if we struggle to learn it.
– We avoid inviting others to participate in our organization’s work because we fear rejection.
These are all natural human responses aimed at avoiding feeling negative emotions. But when we allow ourselves to feel the full spectrum of emotions and consciously reframe situations, we can avoid the negative outcomes created by resistance.
Reframes for the examples above:
– Engaging in uncomfortable, honest conversations fosters vulnerability and trust. Authentic communication is more valuable than people-pleasing.
– Believing that your actions matter, even when they don’t yield the desired results, propels the organization forward. It’s better to feel some disappointment from brave action than from inaction.
– Adopting a growth mindset helps you face embarrassment and learn faster rather than staying stuck. Failure is just your “First Attempt In Learning”.
– When you support yourself and feel confident, others’ participation—or lack thereof—doesn’t have to feel like personal rejection.
Being willing to feel any emotion and questioning the beliefs that generate those emotions leads to a new level of empowerment. Emotional awareness allows us to address the root causes of our actions and make changes when necessary.
Holistic Leadership Coaching
Emotional capacity is central to my holistic leadership coaching. Our empathy and passion propel us forward, but ignoring our fears, frustrations, and disappointments creates avoidable roadblocks. Coaching helps individuals develop the emotional awareness and supportive practices needed to navigate the world of emotions with ease and confidence.
Questions for Reflection:
– What is your current level of emotional awareness and capacity?
– Do you know how to process and make space for the full spectrum of emotions?
– How often do you consciously reframe situations to shift your emotions and create more sustainable energy?
This isn’t something typically taught in schools or professional development programs. So, if you feel you have gaps in your emotional toolkit, there’s no shame in that. Expanding your emotional capacity unlocks a more authentic and empowered version of yourself.
Your feelings might not be as cute as the characters from Inside Out, but they absolutely deserve your attention and a little airtime. As you learn to befriend them, you’ll be able to create the changes you want to see.
[If you’re reading this in September 2024, join me for a Free Masterclass: “Emotional Wellness in Leadership” on October 3rd at 12pm CST. A replay will be available for those who register.]
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Sonya Perez-Lauterbach is a Certified Leadership Coach, Change Expert, and the creator of Leadership Atlas™—a holistic approach to leadership development integrating the mental, emotional, and embodied aspects of leading. Sonya has worked with leaders in social enterprises, education, and nonprofit organizations for nearly 20 years. She has studied with renowned psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel and earned her Master of Science in Learning & Organizational Change from Northwestern University.
Learn more and connect with Sonya at SONYAPEREZ.COM